I learned in my mix of being that I was self dependent. Self dependency - relying on oneself for emotional, physical and spiritual support. Though I have people (a limited amount of family relatives) in my life who can support me, internally, I am my own support, and a great damn support along with that.
I had to repair myself by being and living in silence for years. After a medical emergency, I realized that I needed to focus deeply into being more than what I was once before. Many blessings came about in the midst of that awareness. I was finally FREE. Free to express how I felt, who I was and what I was wanting to become. My goal going forward from that point was to focus on goals. Those goals included the small and big goals in my life.
Energy
One goal I never had in mind was sharing my life with somebody that wasn’t ready. Ready being that self-love and self-care was a focus and concentration of one’s life. I always told myself that I couldn’t allow myself to resolve/repair a person’s mental, physical or psychological issues because it would take a lot of energy. I can give very little energy to a person’s issue(s) because It might require professional attention. My main goal is to focus my energy on my own personal goals and to help with others. I enjoy sharing and trying my best to do what I can do but in situations like those, a person has to choose to build and work on one’s own issues.
Pieces
Many people think that sex is a case or physical desires are great but as for me I only encourage self-love and self-care. I don’t want to be just with anybody and be doing just anything with whomever. I want to be with just ONE person who is willing to be just that ideal person who has reached the level of self-care and self-love so that nothing can be toxic when a companionship does come into play. My goal is to build, not to invest energy into things/people that might not be able to be fixed. Some people or things that are broken, sometimes can not be fixed. There are broken pieces that can be restored and there are some that can’t be.
Think about if you are permanently broken or repairable?
If you aren’t permanently broken, you might be able to build with somebody who has a high expectation for self-care and self-love.
To be continued ....
